Healing & Recovery Lifestyle Mind Spirit

How to Create Happiness – Evaluating Relationships

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Relationships In Life

Relationships are SO important- from friendships to romantic or professional relationships made up of family, friends, acquaintances the point is that we all have several types of relationships in our lives and based on studies, have a direct correlation with our happiness and longevity.

As I approach a new phase in my life, motherhood, I have found myself going out less, staying in more and giving myself the time and space to reflect carefully on what matters to me most, especially moving forward. I have noticed that those I have been there for in the past, may not have shown up in the way that I thought they would- and these realizations are all just apart of growth and life no doubt. With that said, it can still be disappointing.

Such experiences have made me reflect even father into the quality of my relationships and what type of relationships I want (and feel I deserve) moving forward- especially as this will be setting an example with my daughter who is on her way soon!

The Different Facets of Relationships in My Life, and Yours.

I have always been a very independent individual, and there will be some changes happening with my own living situation (such as living almost full time with my boyfriend aka baby’s father). The romantic relationship between us, especially with a newborn on its way, has already started to shift; and we are entering into a new space. I don’t see this as a “good” or a “bad” but rather a new season with new ways that we will need to adapt. Are you in a partnership or romantic relationship of any sort? How are you finding things and how does this relationship effect you?

I am also recognizing that as I have grown as a person, I have moved forward from certain friendships- for whatever reasons that I need not mention in detail here because the essence of the learning is that in life, not everyone is able to show up for you in ways that you have for them- often times it has nothing to do with you and more to do with where they are at. It is still a disappointment to say the least, but yet it makes me feel so greatful for those that are able to be amazing friends. Do you struggle with feeling like your friendships are sometimes a reciprocation “one-way-street”? Critisism/gossip/jealousy are also NOT okay.

I have also started to recognize the signs of toxic friendship, and what I am willing to allow (or rather not allow) in my life. Luckily, toxicity is very few and far between for me- and so it is quite easy for me to step back into a place of gratitude for everything and everyone I do have. Friends can resent your happiness and joy if they are dealing with their own inadequacies that have nothing to do with you- but that doesn’t mean that you need to put up with that behaviour. Do you often get the feeling that your “friends” are not as happy for you or supportive as they would like you to think? It might be time to re-evaluate those friendships. A simple solution for this is to spend more time with those who do uplift and support you.

I make these points because relationships/friendships, particularly those that are toxic are depleting and negative, create a ripple effect within our lives. If we are fighting with a friend or loved one consistently/dealing with ineffective communication or feeling like we are unappreciated or undervalued (just to name a few things that can come up with any relationship no matter what the context of the relationship is) then it can greatly affect our emotions, our relationships and our life. Family dynamics can be challenging, as those relationships can be more complex- and sometimes not as easy to distance ourselves from given the nature of family relationships.

Don’t forget that there are many amazing people out there in the world- and people come into your life not always as a forever friend, but rather to show you more about yourself, and teach you lessons on tolerance, self-love, self-worth, and what you are no longer willing to put up with.

You cannot change another person but you can change yourself, how you view the world and how you deal with situations. The first step to all of this is awareness.

Don’t forget to download the live evaluation book above, and take time to reflect on the relationships on your life 🙂

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